Smart And Socially Inept

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In high school, I was known as the smart girl; not the fun girl or the nice girl, but the smart girl.

I wasn’t invited to sleepovers or to hang out on weekends. What I thought of as interesting conversation — politics, science, current events — was seen as boring or showing off.

Feeling isolated, I became depressed, lonely, and withdrawn. But instead of giving in to those feelings, I tried harder socially. I threw myself into clubs, sports, and musicals. And things did get better. I made friends and built a bomb resume. And this past semester, I was rewarded with an acceptance to Harvard.

Still, I worry because all my social will seems to have dried up. I’m scared that at Harvard I won’t be able to muster this sort of effort twice.  I know I have let go of my high school reservations that have held me back socially and emotionally. College is new, and I’ll just have to keep reminding myself that this time it can be different.

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